We are humbled—truly, humbled—by the singular talents of you, our astute readership. Shortly after petitioning you to find the perfect man or woman to assume the psychologically complex role of Reginald Peterson—the sandwich-dressing-deprived Subway patron who boldly tried to take on the system and lost—and combing through your many suggestions (surprisingly, Abigail Breslin's name never came up), one casting idea came through the Defamer tipbox that towered above all others. The clear winner is after the jump.

"F. Gary Gray - director of The Italian (Sub) Job." Ladies and gentlemen: thank you for playing. We have our winner. Now if we can only coax Mr. Gray out from behind the cameras to step into the starring role in Crazy Sauce: The Reginald Petersen Story that he was born to play, our work here will be done.

• Previously: Help Us Cast The Subway Sandwich 911-Caller MOW [Defamer]

Well, that was fast: Mere days after first drawing attention on a disability issues blog (and eventually going under magnifying glasses at the NY Times and here at Defamer HQ), DreamWorks's mock Web site for Simple Jack is gone. The site had been part of the studio's complex interweaving of Tropic Thunder tie-ins, with its "Once upon a time... there was a retard" tagline tipping the story of a disabled farmhand whom Ben Stiller's character portrays in pursuit of an Oscar. But activist Patricia Bauer's vigil continued, culminating late Monday with a handy restitution checklist for Stiller, DreamWorks and their distribution partners at Paramount:

·Paramount/Dreamworks should pull all references to the words “retard,” “imbecile,” “moron” and “idiot” from the movie, DVD, trailers, promotional material and merchandising;

·Paramount/DreamWorks should pull all scenes and clips that include Ben Stiller’s portrayal of Simple Jack from the movie, DVD, trailers, promotional material and merchandising;

·Ben Stiller, DreamWorks and Paramount should apologize ...

·Paramount/Dreamworks should commit to consulting people with disabilities during the development process about scripts that portray them...

And the list goes on, though this last point is problematic: Tropic Thunder does not depict "people with disabilities," but rather Stiller's portrayal of a bad actor depicting someone with disabilities — a grievous Hollywood standby for which Sean Penn, Cuba Gooding Jr., Dustin Hoffman, Juliette Lewis and that guy from Gigli among sundry other 'retards' of varying severity all owe far more urgent apologies.

Anyway, isn't Diablo Cody connected with this somehow? She's always to blame for something around here. Apologize already, would you?

• Readers: What’s your advice on ‘Tropic Thunder’? [Patricia E. Bauer]
• ‘Tropic Thunder’ Abandoning ‘Simple Jack’? [Vulture]

She’s on movie screens nationwide these days in her latest hit film “The X Files: I Want to Believe.” And yesterday (August 4), the folks over at LAX International Airport got a quick glimpse of Amanda Peet in person.

The “Igby Goes Down” hottie made her way through the terminal, flashing a smile and looking cute and casual in a grey hooded pullover overtop a white t-shirt with cuffed jeans and some sexy spectacles.

Lisa Marie “I’m not fat, I’m pregnant” Presley is having twins. Lisa Marie and husband #4, Michael Lockwood are expecting in the fall. Rumors about the possibility of twins have been swirling since March (boy and a girl).

After being photographed looking plump in a yellow hoodie, Lisa Marie was forced to admit her pregnancy before she was ready to. Legal action was rumored against the UK Daily Mail newspaper the originators of the photos and media comments about her weight, which forced her to reveal the pregnancy. The twins will be Lisa Marie’s first children with husband Michael. She has a daughter and a son, Riley, and Benjamin, with first husband Danny Keough.

Now, according to Entertainment Tonight, Lisa Marie has confirmed through her mom that she is indeed expecting twins, and that the babies are due in the fall. Mom Priscilla reveals her daughter had wanted to keep the news private for as long as possible. She tells Entertainment Tonight:

Lisa Marie wanted it really to be kept a secret for a long time, and I think women should, because they should be able to announce what they’re having and when it’s time to make the announcement.

Twins run in Lisa Marie’s family, dad Elvis was a twin and Priscilla has younger brothers who are twins, as well.

newVideoPlayer("/debrob_def.flv", 506, 423,""); We have been overcome today by a tidal wave of sympathy for everyone's favorite non-silly-voiced summer superhero Robert Downey Jr., who just can't seem to catch a break on his Tropic Thunder press junket. No sooner had he been ambushed by a rogue reporter from the I'm A Drunken Stoned Moron Entertainment News Syndicate, he then came face to face with E!'s Debbie Matenopoulos.

At least the other guy gave multiple-choice options for his idiotic, "Who'd you rather divorce/skullfuck/play-Halo 3-with?" line of questioning. Matenopolous, on the other hand, seems perfectly happy to just let random keywords drawn from the press materials hang in the air, strung together festively by a string of ellipses: "Vietnam...clearly...how did this happen?...genius...Oscar...[chuckle]...Avengers...Stiller...Chaplin?" Now, if you'll excuse us, we're going to shoot some smack between our toes. If we're going to nod off, we might as well enjoy the experience.

• Painful-to-Watch Video of the Day [WOW Report]

In a rush to finish her grocery shopping, beloved actress Kate Hudson decided to sneak her shopping cart into the express lane at Whole Foods. Hudson knew that she was well over the item limit for the trendy organic market, but believed her trademark charm would allow her to get away with it. After scanning a few items, the Whole Foods cashier noticed that Hudson was going to be well over the express lane limit and stopped scanning. Hudson wondered what the problem was, but the cashier pointed to the sign above her post with the item limit and added, "I've scanned the express lane limit, ma'am." Hudson asked if the cashier could give her a mulligan this time around and that the next time, she'll wait in the regular line with everybody else. The cashier pensively thought for a moment, then returned to scanning items. The cashier said, "This is only because I loved Raising Helen."

Photo Credit: Flynet

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

Kelsey Grammer was just released from the hospital today. He was admitted the hospital on Monday last week after ‘feeling faint’.

His rep issued this statement today: “Kelsey Grammer is out of the hospital, feeling great and about to resume normal activities at home. He and his wife Camille want to thank everyone who expressed concern. They appreciated the kind words.”

This recent trip to the hospital preceeded a heat attack in May. His spokesman said at the time it was a mild heart attack but declined to give further details of Grammer’s condition or medical treatment. Well the truth was Kelsey nearly died from that heart attack last month, and his heart actually stopped. He was released later on June 4.

So while Kelsey may have been admitted this time after feeling faint, something was going on to keep him in the hospital for 8 days!

When it comes to choice models to give your new fashion line a little extra bump, you can’t do much better than Victoria’s Secret hottie Miranda Kerr.

And the awesome Aussie babe was spotted working the runway like the seasoned pro that she is at the David Jones summer fashion launch held in Sydney earlier today (August 5).