newVideoPlayer("/todosuzie_def.flv", 506, 423,""); The season finale of The Two Coreys was the source of much consternation over here at Defamer HQ. While we'll never know if the Haimster and Felddog will be able to make amends after their friendship-crushing throwdown (that is, until A&E greenlights Season Three), the episode spurred our own Molly McAleer to spend her lunch break sprawled out on lawn somewhere in K-Town postulating which Corey was truly at fault for this epic breakdown. But, as some of you noted, Susie Feldman escaped Molly's rant virtually unscathed. Tonight, all that changes. Enjoy!

· Conor Oberst at the Troubadour.
· Peanut Butter Wolf at Cinespace.
· Maya Rudolph and Fred Armisen at Largo.
· Jon Lovtiz at the Comedy and Magic Club.

While you might expect to be mildly offended by the people behind Date Movie, Epic Movie, and Meet the Spartans, it's usually because they're coming out with more movies rather than because of anything in the films themselves. Now, though, they've made the classy move of premiering their latest spoof, Disaster Movie, on August 29th — the third anniversary of the Hurricane Katrina disaster.

An honest mistake or a publicity grab? We'd like to believe it's the former, though you would think shooting the film in Louisiana might have opened the filmmakers' eyes a bit. At the very least, this should be a fun one for New Orleans Saint Reggie Bush (the boyfriend of Disaster star Kim Kardashian) to wriggle out of. As our tipster wondered: "Would they have premiered Terrorist Movie, a spoof of the Die Hard genre, on September 11th?" Shortly after this brainstorm, Paramount called to offer the tipster marketing duties for Cloverfield 2.

• DISASTERMOVIE.NET

Following his involvement in a serious car accident on Sunday night, Morgan Freeman is slowly but surely recovering after undergoing surgery to reconnect nerves and repair damage in his left hand.

As previously reported by Gossip Girls, the 71-year-old Academy Award-winning actor was listed in serious condition after his car careened off of the highway and overturned twice before landing upright in a ditch.

newVideoPlayer("/paltrowvote_def.flv", 506, 423,""); Gwyneth Paltrow has worked really hard at ditching her snottier-than-thou attitude this year. Not only did she go to great lengths to sex up her image during the seemingly endless Iron Man press tour by donning a series of towering heels and flashing ample amounts of thigh, her admission that she's raising a pair of cross-dressing toddlers might even earn a nod of approval from the Lou Reed and David Johansen's of the world. But all of the inroads she's built look like they could come crashing down, thanks to her appearance in a hoity-toity political ad airing overseas now.

After crushing poor Scarlett Johansson's double-D sized heart after publicly imploding their burgeoning email relationship, Barack Obama has been battling charges of elitism from the right-wing media and fending off attacks from John McCain that he's just another Valtrex popping celebutard. While recruiting Gwyneth Paltrow to appear in a special "Vote Abroad" campaign might help with the latter attack, it certainly doesn't help him with the former.

And as for Gwyneth? We're not sure what it is about you that we're supposed to identify with as being All-American these days. You live abroad (meaning, you're not just there temporarily for a job). You're married to a mopey musician (who was born, raised and currently abides in England). You're raising your kids to be British. You won an Oscar ... for playing a Brit. Forgive us if we're finding it difficult to find the ties between you and baseball, hot dogs, apple pie and Chevrolet. Except, of course, for the fact that you named your kid Apple.

• 'Iron Man' star Gwyneth Paltrow backs Barack Obama in PSA

Check out the top ten selections from Starpulse's Kate Beckinsale photo gallery (which currently stands at seven pages of super-hotness). Kate got her start at the bottom of the "cast and crew" lists for several movies

Read more!

There are certain universal truths about Hollywood agents: namely, that they never pick up your phone calls, deal with you mostly through their assistants, and always seem to be finding work for people who aren't you. Sadly, E! bobblehead Giuliana Rancic (who we last saw announcing the death of "Brad Redfro" while dressed in a somber tube top) has failed to grasp that last tenet — in fact, she's suing her agents at William Morris for having the audacity to focus on anyone but her. Says Page Six:

Rancic, who hosts E! News with Ryan Seacrest, is suing her former agency for "breach of contract and fiduciary duty," according to her lawyer, Lavely & Singer bulldog Paul Sorrell. "They put the interests of other clients they had ahead of hers," Sorrell said. "It was a major conflict of interest, so she fired them."

Now that the Dam of Obviousness has been breached, we expect lawsuits against WMA any minute on the grounds that "they exist," "they take ten percent commission," and "they're mean." We've contacted William Morris for comment, though we've been assured "they'll get back to you soon, they're just at lunch — I mean, 'really swamped right now.'"

• SUE THE AGENT [New York Post]

Suck It, Seacrest. Here's a pathetic little statistic for you: 300 people attended American Idol's first-ever audition in Puerto Rico. How's Simon Cowell supposed to work with that? It's not nearly as fun tearing apart some deluded young gay's dreams when there aren't 47,000 more deluded young gays waiting nervously outside the door for their own shot at humiliation. You guys barely even gave Paula a chance to get drunk! (PS: Puerto Rico, you are the coolest place in the greater U.S. and its territories right now. Own that. No one can take it away from you.) [UPI]

A quick survey of informants drunkenly furloughed next door at the Pink Taco have confirmed that MGM Tower was not — we repeat, not — blown to bits after a reported bomb threat earlier this morning. In fact, we hear that work resumed on site within the last hour after a building search turned up nothing. One tipster sends word that "the receptionist who took the call couldn't tell whether it was a young boy or young girl," instantly suggesting a relatively tame prank that nevertheless shook the very souls (or whatever amounts to the ICM equivalent) of the tower's tenants.

Follow the jump for the official all-clear, plus a brief anthology of survivor stories from the front.

—-—Original Message—-—
From: xxxx
Sent: Tuesday, August 05, 2008 1:29 PM
To: xxxx
Subject: MGM Tower Threat

Please be advised that the police department didn't find anything problematic so there is no longer a cause for concern. Please return to work. Thank you for your cooperation.

And now, word from the displaced:

[E]verything seems ok. Icm is done cat calling caa assists across the street I guess cause they're returning now. Le sigh. Back to work. Just another crazy thing to happen in century city I'd hate to see what's next.

Friend of mine just had lunch next to evacuees —they said the receptionist who took the call couldn't tell whether it was a young boy or young girl.

The all clear came in @1:30, nothing found, and a slightly passive aggressive "please return to work right the fuck now" (w/me adding "the fuck") on the auto recording — threat was called into a something called a "christianson glaser" (not sp correctly) — and there's a guy playing ragtime on the grand piano in the bldg lobby. Literally writing this, most work I've done today.